Q: How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?
A: Pick it up and suck it's dick.
Vote:
Fred collected lots of money from trick-or-treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate.
"You should give that money to charity," said the sales girl.
Fred thought for a moment and said, "No, I'll buy the chocolate.
You give the money to charity."
There was a 3 car accident in Mexico yesterday, 84 people were found dead.
Vote:
A couple have been dating for a few weeks, but the guy has been afraid of making advances because he thinks his penis is on the small side.
Finally, he gets up his courage and takes her down lovers’ lane. While they’re kissing, he opens his trouser zip and guides her hand onto his organ.
‘No thanks,’ says the girl. ‘I don’t smoke.’
How do you stop an Iraqi tank?
"Just shoot the guy that's pushing it!"
Vote:
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
sugar is sweet,
but nothing compared to you.
My girlfriend told me that will change me.
I thought she was referring to the character, but she found a new boyfriend!
Vote:
Q: Why is a sheep better than a woman?
A: A sheep doesn't care if you fuck her sister.
What's long and hard on a black guy?
Third grade.
Vote:
Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.