My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry. So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroid's.
Yo Mamma so stupid she put on bug spray before she goes to the flee market!
What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup? A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.
Q: Ever had sex while camping? A: It's fucking intents.
A woman goes to the gynecologist for the first time and is awfully nervous. When the doctor comes into the examining room, he notices immediately that she's very tense. "Listen, dear. I know this must be scary for you. Do you want me to give you some thing to numb you down there?" The girl doesn't say anything, but just nods her head yes. So the doctor removes her underwear, puts his mouth in her crotch. "Numb, numb, numb, numb, numb..."
What does it mean when you see a bunch of black men running in one direction? "A Jail break"
Q: Why did the gay man take two aspirin with his Viagra? A: So sex wouldn't be such a pain in the arse.
Yo mama so slow that when she tried to cross the road she got a parking ticket.
A husband and wife are having financial troubles. They agree she should walk the streets to pick up some extra cash. The husband drops his wife off in the red light area of town, and returns 6 hours later. She gets in the car and says, "Look, I made $40.50 !" "What jerk gave you 50 cents?" he asks. "All of them!"