My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry.
So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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A man walks into a clock shop where a beautiful woman is working.
He walks to the counter unzips his fly and pulls out his cock.
The woman screams "excuse me sir this is a CLOCK SHOP".
I know replied the man "I want two hands and a face put on this".
Q: What do you call cheese that's not yours?
A: Nacho cheese!;)
Teacher: "Who knows 5+5=?"
Little Johnny: "11"
Teacher: "Take out your hand from trousers pocket and count with your fingers."
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There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days.
It's called Monday.
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Your theeth are so yellow when you opend the popcorn packet it said "We are family."
getting ready to stone a prostitute that had been caught in the act. Jesus said, "Let the first stone be thrown by someone who has never sinned"
Suddenly, a rock comes flying over the crowd. Jesus turned, looks and then comments. "Mother!!"
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How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb?
Four.
One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
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Chuck Norris never bathes.
Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.
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How do you get four old ladies to shout "F*ck"?
Get a fifth old lady to shout "Bingo!"
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