Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
Chuck Norris once broke the land bike speed record with a bike with a lost chain and a missing back wheel.
Chuck Norris watched the entire Lord of the Rings without blinking.
Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.