My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.
‘If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?’ Steven Wright
Never borrow money from optimists – they always expect to get it back.
One day the kids in Ms. Evans science class was disagreeing with her.
Ms. Evans was talking about evolution.
Ms. Evans was and atheist so she didn't believe in God.
Then Johnny raised his hand and said, "But I thought God created mankind?"
Ms. Evans then replied, "Well can you see God?"
"No."
"Hear God?"
"No."
"Feel God?"
"No."
This went on for quite a while.
"Well then God doesn't exist."
Then Johnny whispered back to his friend Jimmy, "Can you see Ms. Evan's brain. No, so that must not exist."
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How do you tell if a black girls pregnant?
Shove a banana up her vagina and if you pull it out half eaten then you got a monkey on the way.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as he who shall not be named.
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Johnny was racing around the garden on his new bicycle and called out to his mother to watch his tricks.
"Look, Mum! No hands! Look, Mum! No feet! Waaah! Look, Mum! No teeth!"
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Q: Why couldn't the sailors play cards?
A: The captain was sitting on the deck.
Once Chuck Norris went to Mc Donalds and had a pizza.
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Equation
Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep
Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money
Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys
In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Donkeys