Cow: "Why don't you shoo those flies?" Bull: "I ll let them go barefoot!"
They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
Chuck Norris can have his cake and eat yours too.
Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!
Your mama so fat when she goes in Walmart and goes out it's gone.
Yo' Mama is so skinny, her nipples touch.
Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
Chuck Norris inflated a flat school bus tire, with his lungs.
Everyone knows the speed of light... Chuck Norris knows the speed of darkness.
How did that bullfight come out? Oh, it was a toss-up.