Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: "I really don't get how he can feed himself with that thing!"
I may look calm, but in my mind I have killed you three times already.
Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets? A: She went looking for the three guys.
Q: What comes with the new Divorced Barbie doll? A: All Ken's stuff.
"Excuse me, how do I get to the hospital quickly?" "Just stand in the middle of the road for a while."
What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.
Q: What is the diffrence between a black guy and a pizza A: A pizza can feed a family of four.
The bartender said "Sorry,we don't serve time travelers." Two time travelers walk into a bar.
Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
In funeral of my friend's wife, I went to condole him so I said: "Don't think she was your wife, she was for all".