Yo momma's so fat... When she wears her X jacket helicopters try to land.
Yo mama is so skinny... she hula hoops with a cheerio.
In "ring around the rosie", Chuck Norris does not fall down.
Stevie Wonder recently told his wife that he wants to see other people.
A married couple is sleeping when the phone rings at 3 AM. The wife picks up the phone and, after a few seconds, replies, "How am I supposed to know? We're 200 miles inland!" and hangs up. Her husband rolls over and asks, "Sweetheart, who was that?" "I don't know,some dumb bitch asking if the coast is clear."
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying for it."
Why do women fake orgasms? Because they think men care.
Yo Momma is so ugly that she scares blind people!
Mom! I'm a 3D printer! Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you poop.
Why are there no mexicans on star trek? They don't work in the future either.