When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
Vote:
Chuck Norris is the 51st state.
Vote:
If a hungry shark is after you, what should you feed it?
Jawbreakers.
Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal.
"There's a human with a gun, and he's getting closer and closer! What are we going to do?"
To which the second skink calmly replied, "Let us spray ."
Yo Momma so poor I stepped in her house and I was in the backyard.
What does CPA stand for?
Can't Pass Again.
Vote:
While having their evening dinner together, a little girl looked up at her father and asked, "Daddy, you're the boss in our family, right?"
The father was very pleased to hear it and confidently replied, "Yes my little princess."
The girl then continued, "That's because mommy put you in charge, right?"
No!
You don't have "Bad luck".
You have low IQ and you make bad decisions.
Patient: "May I have a glass of water, doctor."
Doctor: "Are you thirsty?"
Patient: "No… I just wanted to check whether my throat leaks."
Q: What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move?
A: The splits!