There's a rumor that Steve Jobs, has been a Buddhist, has been reincarnated as a factory worker on a sweatshop assembly line in China.
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My grandmother used to tell us a joke.
She'd say "Knock knock."
We'd say "Who's there?".
Then she'd say "I can't remember" and start to cry.
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What is a cursor?
Someone having computer problems.
Life is a car wash … and I’m on a bicycle.
After spending 20 minutes trying to get my wife's bra off, I decided to give up,
I wish I'd never put it on now.
I'll be honest.
I did not graduate at the top of my class.
In fact, I was so close to the bottom, my sheepskin had a tail.
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This woman walks into a bar, and she has the hairiest armpits in the history of armpits.
She sits down, raises her arm, and says, "Bartender, I would like a drink."
There's an old drunk sitting next to her.
Slurring, he says, "Barkeep, I would like to buy the ballerina a drink."
She accepts, drinks it, raises her arm again to get the bartender's attention, and orders another.
The old man says, "Barkeep, you just keep giving the ballerina anything she wants."
Finally, the bartender goes over to the drunk and says, "Sir, that's nice of you, but how do you know she's a ballerina?"
The old man answers, "Son, you don't get to be my age without learning that only ballerinas can lift their legs that high."
I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position.
Please be prepared for my mood.
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Did you hear that the Post Office had to recall its series of stamps depicting famous lawyers?
People were confused about which side to spit
Q: How do pirates make their money?
A: By hook or by crook!