Yo mama is so stupid, I said it was going to be chili out and she grabbed a bowl and a spoon.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a beard by choice, even the jaws of life can't cut it.
When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."
Yo mama is so dark that that she can leave fingerprints on carbon.
In "ring around the rosie", Chuck Norris does not fall down.
On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
If he wanted to, Chuck Norris could rob a bank. By phone.
Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
What is a cow's favorite lunch meat? Bullogna.