Joke #10797

Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal. "There's a human with a gun, and he's getting closer and closer! What are we going to do?" To which the second skink calmly replied, "Let us spray ."
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered the bedroom window. As the young lady parted her legs the bee entered her vagina. The woman started screaming "Oh my god, help me, there's a bee in my vagina!" The husband immediately took her to the local doctor and explained the situation. The doctor thought for a moment and said "Hmm, tricky situation. But I have a solution to the problem if young sir would permit." The husband being very concerned agreed that the doctor could use whatever method to get the bee out of his wife's vagina. The doctor said "OK, what I'm gonna do is rub some honey over the top of my penis and insert it into your wife's vagina. When I feel the bee getting closer to the tip of my penis I shall withdraw it and the bee should hopefully follow my penis out of your wife's vagina. The husband nodded and gave his approval. The young lady said "Yes, Yes, whatever, just get on with it." So the doctor, after covering the tip of his penis with honey, inserted it into the young lady's vagina. After a few gentle strokes, the doctor said, "I don't think the bee has noticed the honey yet. Perhaps I should go a bit deeper." So the doctor went deeper and deeper. After a while the doctor began shafting the young lady very hard indeed. The young lady began to quiver with excitement. She began to moan and groan aloud. The doctor, concentrating very hard, looked like he was enjoying himself, he then put his hands on the young lady's breasts and started making loud noises. The husband at this point suddenly became very annoyed and shouted, "Now wait a minute! What the Hell do you think you're doing?" The doctor, still concentrating, replied, "Change of plan. I'm gonna drown the bastard!"
Vote: has 80.46 % from 5466 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, doctor, love, sex
Two shepherds lean on their crooks at the end of a long day and the first asks the second, "So, how's it going?" The second one sighed and shook his head, "Not good, I can't pay my bills, my health isn't good, my kids don't respect me, and my wife is leaving me." The first replied, "Well, don't lose any sheep over it."
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, health, money, wife
What did the naughty rabbit leave for Easter? Deviled eggs.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, celebrity, life, music
A skunk and a rabbit were running through the woods and accidentally they collided with each other. They both got amnesia from the crash. "Who am I? What am I?" said the rabbit confused. "Well, you're one such... with a short tail, long ears..." "I guess!" shouted the rabbit, "I'm a rabbit!" "And what am I?" asked the skunk. "Ah! Yes. You're one such hairy, smelly, with a strip in the middle..." "Wow!", yelled the skunk, "Probably I'm an ass!"
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common? Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Mommy Bear and Daddy Bear were in divorce court. The judge looked down and asked the Baby Bear, "So Baby Bear, do you want to live with Daddy Bear?" "Oh, no," Baby Bear replied, "I don't want to live with Daddy Bear. He beat me." "Well then, you should live with Mommy Bear," answered the judge. "On, no, I don't want to live with Mommy Bear. She beat me." "Well then, Baby Bear, who do you want to live with?" Baby Bear said, "I want to live with the Chicago Bears. They don't beat anybody!"
Vote: has 73.30 % from 216 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, baby, divorce, sport
Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail? Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
Vote: has 41.91 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog, internet, IT
Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, dog
What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal