Best jokes ever

If you want to drive your wife crazy don’t talk in your sleep, just smile.
Vote: has 63.74 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage
Two hookers standing on a street corner started discussing business. One of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "Sorry No, I just burped."
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More jokes about: sex
What rule could stop HIV in Africa? Sex after dinner only.
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More jokes about: black humor
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. The next week the man realized that he would need his wife to wake him at 5.00 am for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he finally wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5.00 am." The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9.00am, and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed ... it said... "It is 5.00am; wake up."
Vote: has 63.72 % from 320 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, time, wife
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
There was a vampire who sucked people's blood for many centuries. God was very angry at the vampire and said to him, "You're going to hell!" The vampire fell to his knees and said, "God, I beg of you, give me one more chance to be good." God agreed. Then the vampire said, "I want to be light, fluffy, and white like a cloud." "That seems easy enough," replied God. "I would also like to have wings like an angel." "OK," replied God. Since God had said yes to all his requests, the vampire decided to ask for a very greedy request. "God, if possible, could you let me suck a little blood?" "Sure," replied God, "but only once a month." And he turned the vampire into a maxi pad with wings.
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, god
Yo' Mama is like my cell phone plan: 10 cents a minute anytime, anywhere, no restrictions.
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More jokes about: money, phone, Yo mama
Q: Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? A: Finding half a worm."
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More jokes about: animal, disgusting, food
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist
What goes: "Click-is that it? Click-is that it? Click-is that it?" A blind person with a rubix cube.
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, game