You mama is so fat, when she goes to the movies she sits next to everyone!
Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
Vote:
How many social media marketers does it take to change a light bulb?
It’s not about the change - it’s about engaging people in conversations about the light bulb change.
How many blondes does it take to milk a cow?
Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
Yo momma so poor...
When I visited her trailer, 2 cockroaches tripped me and a Rat tried to steal me wallet.
Yo momma so poor...
When I rang her doorbell, SHE said 'Ding-Dong'
Sorry to have missed you, but I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.
Q: What do you call a group of 8 hobbits
A: Hobbyte.
Why does a blonde put perfume on her ankles?
Because it ends up behind her ears anyway!
A male driver gets stopped by police, and is asked: "Have you been drinking?"
The man replies: "Okay, yes, I have... how did you know officer? Was I swerving across the road, or speeding?"
"No sir," replied the policeman, "...nothing else can explain that fat ugly woman sitting next to you."