Yo mama so stupid, I said, "Why do you have 2 quarters in your ears?"
And she said, "I am listening to 50 cent."
What did the black epileptic have written on his t-shirt?
"Help I'm not break dancing"
Vote:
Spider-man can crawl on walls and ceilings, Chuck Norris can crawl on water.
Vote:
Chuck Norris could play cd-based games on his Nintendo 64.
Vote:
Q: What's the scariest thing about a white man in prison?
A: You know that he actually did it.
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Q: Where do Snowmen go to dance?
A: To snowballs.
Q: What do birds give out on Halloween?
A: Tweets!
Vote:
Q: How many Apple Iphone 6 early adopters does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and bitch about the lack of obscure features!
Vote:
An alcoholic walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly.
He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry.
I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."
"Why you worthless, stupid, no good drunk!" she screamed.
"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.