Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Yo mama so fat, her portrait fell off the wall.
Yo mamma is not on a diet, she's on a triet, anything you eating-shell try it.
Yo Momma IS SO FAT WHEN YOU GO AROUND HER YOU GET LOST!
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
Did you hear about the new Exorcist Movie? They got the Devil to come in to take the Priest out of the child.
Dad: "I heard you missed school yesterday." Little Johnny: "Not a bit."
I don't understand why everyone hates black people so much. Black people are great! Everyone should own one!
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?" She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with Betty Sue written on it." He says, "Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? Betty Sue was the name of the horse I went there to bet on." She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he is reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?" She answers, "Your horse called."
As a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what happened. The blonde began, "It was the strangest thing! I looked up and saw a tree, so I swerved to the right. Then I saw another tree, so I swerved to left. Then there was another tree, and another and another ..." The sheriff thought for a minute and then said, "Mam ... I don't know how to tell you this, but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty miles is your air freshener."