Yo mama's so fat that, after sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch!
How are black people and wolves similar?
They both fight in packs.
Vote:
What do you call a bunch of mexicans in a barn?
Modern farm equiptment.
What’s the difference between a barmaid in the evening and a barmaid at night?
A barmaid in the evening is fair and buxom.
A barmaid at night is bare and...
Two friends talk:
"Hi, what are you doing?"
"Not much, writing a Valentine's Day greeting card."
"Why are you writing it with your left hand? Are you left-handed?"
"No, I just can't let my right hand to see it. It's a surprise for it."
Vote:
Q: Why did Daft Punk spend the night with a Leprechaun?
A: He was "Up all night to get lucky"
Are your legs made of Nutella?
Because I'd love to spread them!
"Life is like a box of chocolates."
Not all the black ones can be trusted.
Vote:
Blonde: "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me."
Psychiatrist: "Don't you have a cell phone?"
Blonde: "They're too expensive, so I did the next best thing: I put a mailbox in my car."
Psychiatrist: "And do you receive any letters?"
Blonde: "No, but I figure it's because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps changing."
Q: Two blondes are standing on top of the Empire State Building.
How can you tell which one is the true blonde and which one is the bleached blonde?
A: The bleached blonde isn't throwing bread crumbs at the helicopters!