Two friends talk:
"Hi, what are you doing?"
"Not much, writing a Valentine's Day greeting card."
"Why are you writing it with your left hand? Are you left-handed?"
"No, I just can't let my right hand to see it. It's a surprise for it."
Vote:
Yo mama so old she ran track with the dinosaurs.
What's the difference between a tiger and a lion?
A tiger has the mane part missing.
Q: What do you call a dictionary on drugs?
A: HIGH-Definition.
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Q: What did the letter O said to the letter Q?
A: Dude, your dick is hanging out.
Vote:
There is legend that goes like this:
In a bar in New York there is a magical mirror If you go up to it and tell it the truth it will grant you a wish If you lie – poof it swallows you up.
A brunette, a blonde and a redhead walk into this bar.
They head straight for the mirror.
The redhead goes first and says “I think I’m the most beautiful woman on Earth” Poof- the mirror swallows her up.
The brunette goes up to the mirror and says “I think I’m the sexiest woman on Earth” Poof – the mirror swallows her up.
Last, the blonde goes up to the mirror says ” I think...” Poof!
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
Vote:
Yo mama so old, she walked into a museum and found her ex.
Vote:
Take a squirt gun into the rest room stall next to someone and shoot little drops over the wall every couple of seconds while pretending to pee.
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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a dartboard?
A: Yo' Mama's had more pricks.