What kind of sharks make good carpenters? Hammerheads.
In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.
What do you call an unusual rabbit? A rare hare.
Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.
Q: What do you call a group financial controller who's lost his job? A: Bob.
Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
For Chuch Norris, ANYTHING counts in horseshoes and handgrenades.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.