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Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?  A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.
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Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?  A: After a dye job.
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Chuck Norris can milk birds.
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Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
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Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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When Chuck Norris runs backwards during a fight, it may seem like he's retreating. He's not. He's just attacking from another direction.
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What do a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them.
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Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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