Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
Yo mama is so fat, that she broke stairway to heaven.
Q: How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 10, 1 to change the bulb and 9 to share the experience.
Yo'Mama is so stupid, she threw a baseball at Batman.
Chuck Norris can get breakfast at McDonalds after 11, at Taco Bell.
Chuck Norris favorite pick up line: ''now''
Q: Wanna know the biggest lie my dad ever told me? A: I'll be back.
Q: Why weren't the Republicans behind the verdict in the Saddam Hussein Trial a couple of days before the 2006 Midterm Elections? A: Because they were so busy fixing the price on oil!
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV, it's a microwave!"
Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? He had locomotives.