Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ? A: Turkey.
Did you hear about Ku Klux Kineivals latest stunt? He is going to try to jump 50 niggers with a steam roller.
A young girl with a bag is crossing the customs. Customs officers check her bag and find some kind of powder. They ask the girl: "What kind of powder is that?" "Heroin" "But heroin is matte-white, and this powder is orange." "This is a kids' heroine – orange taste."
A man is driving his eighteen wheeler down the road, when he sees a hitch hiker. So the trucker stops and picks up the man. While they are driving down the road, the trucker says "Hey man, you wanna see something pretty cool?" The hitch hiker says sure. So the trucker has this monkey in the back, and he makes it come up with the men, and he smacks the monkey up side his head, and the monkey gives him a blow job. So after that, the trucker says "Hey man, do you want some of that?" And the hitch hiker says "Sure, but just don't smack me so hard."
Whats the similarity between getting a bl*wjob from an 80 year old and walking the tightrope ? In both cases you really dont want to look down !
An apple and a black person both fall off a tree at the exact same time who hits the ground first? The apple because the rope catches the black person.
Dad says to his son, "Don't mast*rbate to much because you will go blind." Son say, "I'm over here?"
Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour. "Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do." "Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."
Why shouldn't white people go swimming? Because crackers get soggy when wet.
What did the Zen Buddist say to the hotdog vendor? Make me one with everything.