A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar.
They talk, they connect, and they end up leaving together.
They get back to her place, and as she shows him around, he notices that her bedroom is completely packed with teddy bears.
Hundreds of small bears are on a shelf all the way along the floor, medium sized ones are on a shelf a little higher, and huge bears are on the top shelf along the wall.
The man is kind of surprised by the collection, especially because it’s so extensive, but he decides not to mention this to her.
She turns to him…they kiss…then they rip each other’s clothes off and romp around the room all night.
After an intense night of passion, as they are lying there together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well, how’d I do?”
The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.”
Why did the pervert cross the road?
Because he was stuck in the chicken.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I think I've lost an electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first says, "Yes, I'm positive..."
The sun is Chuck Norris's pocket flashlight.
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Q: What is the difference between a teenager on her rag and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
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"Will you marry me?" Is a marriage proposal.
"Will, You, Mary, Me" is a foursome proposal.
I forgot to post on Facebook I was going to the gym.
Now this whole workout was a waste of time.
There are 4 guys in a car, 1 from Iowa,1 from Wisconsin, 1 from Florida, and 1 from Illinois.
The guy from Florida says "I’m tired of seeing oranges everyday" so he throws some oranges out the window.
So then the guy from Iowa says "I’m tired of seeing Corn everyday" so he throws some corn out the window.
The guy from Wisconsin is very inspired so he opens the door and pushs the guy from Illinois out of the car!
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge?
A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
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Let's walk and talk.
You go that way.
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