All of Chuck Norris's opinions can be proven with science.
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men? A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
If you use Chuck Norris in a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, you automatically win.
Chuck Norris is a hunter. But Chuck Norris does not hunt. That implies the possibility of failure.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
An FBI agent was interviewing a bank teller after the bank had been robbed 3 times by the same bandit: "Did you notice anything special about the man?" asks the agent. "Yes," replied the teller. "He was better dressed each time."
Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
How do you go about hiring a horse? Try two pairs of stilts!
Yo mamma so ugly when she was walking to the bank. They turned of the security cameras.
You know "The Matrix" that was Chuck Norris' very first dream.