Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch.
He simply decides what time it is.
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Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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He, who laughs last, laughs best.
He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
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Chuck Norris invented hot sauce.
To put on his peppers.
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris has a website, is called the internet.
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