Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
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Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed.
Some get away.
They are called astronauts.
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Superman's weakness isn't kryptonite, it's obvious who it is...
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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Scientists have developed a way to travel through time, by being on the recieving end of a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris.
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Q: What's the easiest way to a persons heart?
A: Chuck Norris' fist
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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Chuck Norris can watch music.
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Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
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