Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It was escaping from K.F.C.
Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Q: What did the maxi pad say to the fart?
A: You are the wind beneath my wings.
Vote:
Chuck Norris once appeared on celebrity wipeout.
They had to end the season after he destroyed the sucker punch wall with his chin.
Vote:
Chuck Norris sleeps with his gun over his pillow.
Vote:
If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.
Vote:
What is a "successful hunting trip"?
When three men kill 9 cases of Budweiser in two days
Q: What's the difference between pea soup and roast beef?
A: Anyone can roast beef.
Vote:
What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Putting in twelve and sucking out thirteen.
Vote:
A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up.
The gas pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car.
He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?"
The man in the car says "I found them.
I asked myself what to do with them, but I haven't had a clue."
The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo."
"Hey, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away.
The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station.
The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car.
"Hey, they're still here!
I thought you were going to take them to the zoo."
"Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time.
Today I am taking them to the beach."