Chuck norris was born on May 6 1945.
De Nazi surrenderd on May 7 1945.
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Q: What's the difference between Jesus Christ and a painting of Jesus Christ?
A: It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
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One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
Chuck Norris narrates Morgan Freemans life
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1st man: It is sickening the way my wife keps talking about her ex husband..
2nd man: Than's nothing, mine keps talking about her next husband.
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, he said:
"Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face."
"Yes, sir," the boys said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "It's because yer feet ain't empty."
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
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Did you hear about the new Exorcist Movie?
They got the Devil to come in to take the Priest out of the child.
Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her teacher asked her a question.
He inquired, “What grows to 10 times its original size when excited?”
Jane blushed and said that she didn't know.
Jimmy raised his hand and said, “I know! The pupil of the eye.”
The teacher replied, “Yes, very good Jimmy.”
The the teacher turned to Jane and said, “Jane I have three things to say to you: One -- you have a very dirty mind.
Two -- you haven't been studying hard enough. And three -- you're going to be very disappointed!”
Q: What do you call a terrorist attack in the Middle East?
A: A Selfie!
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