A Black man bought a round of drinks for everyone in the bar, announcing that his wife had just given birth to "a typical black baby boy weighing 20 pounds." Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "Wow!" were heard. A woman fainted due to sympathy pains. Two weeks later, he returned to the bar. The bartender said, "Say, you're the proud father of an amazing black baby who weighed 20 pounds at birth. How much does he weigh now?" The proud father answered, "Fifteen pounds." The bartender was puzzled. "Why? What happened? He weighed 20 pounds at birth?" The father drank the bottle of whisky at one go, wiped his lips on his shirtsleeve, leaned into the bartender and said, "Had him circumcised."
Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms? They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.
Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do? A: Shoot the lawyer twice.
Water can drown if Chuck Norris stays underwater for too long.
Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
The energizer bunny freezes when it sees Chuck Norris.
A man went to work for a zoo veterinarian. "Look in the lion's mouth," the vet told him. "How do I do that?" he asked. "Carefully," replied the vet.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
Death was created after Chuck Norris was born.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a security system. Chuck Norris is a security system.