Best jokes ever

Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
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has 57.66 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
One weekend, the husband is in the bathroom shaving when the kid he hired to mow his lawn, a local kid named Bubba, comes in to pee. The husband slyly looks over and is shocked at how immensely endowed Bubba is. He can't help himself, and asks Bubba what his secret is. "Well," says Bubba, "every night before I climb into bed with a girl, I whack my penis on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!" The husband was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night. So before climbing into bed with his wife, he took out his penis and whacked it three times on the bedpost. His wife, half-asleep, said, "Bubba? Is that you?"
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has 57.65 % from 174 votes. More jokes about: husband, kids, marriage, sex
Q: When do Democrats like the idea of a flat tax? A: After it reaches 95%
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has 57.64 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: democrat, money, tax
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
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has 57.64 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, insulting, ugly, Yo mama
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
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has 57.64 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What do you call a white guy with 5 black friends? A: Coach!
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has 57.64 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: racist
Question: Why do men fart more than women? Answer: Because women won’t shut up long enough to build up pressure.
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has 57.62 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: fart, men, women
The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run a few errands and leaves his employee in charge. A woman comes in and wants to purchase a dildo. She looks at the shelf behind the register. "How much for the white one?" "$10." "How much for the black one?" "$20." She buys the white one. A little later , another woman comes in and also wants to buy a dildo. After asking the clerk for prices, she decides on the black one. A third lady comes in for a dildo. She checks the price of the white one , the black one and asks about the plaid one. She makes her purchase and leaves.The proprietor returns and asks how things went. "Great! I sold a white one, a black one, and I got thirty buck for your thermos!"
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has 57.62 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, money, women
Chuck Norris has a black belt in every language.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill. It took forever to get to the top. When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "Whew, that was so hard." The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards."
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: sport
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