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Don King once had straight hair, until that day he saw Chuck Norris' eyes staring him down.
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Phone a friend and tell them you're a doctor, and you're very, very sorry, but you did everything you could to save their... then pretend that the connection dropped out. Wait a couple beats, then give your deepest condolences. Then hang up.
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Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
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Yo momma so poor... The building society repossessed her cardboard box.
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Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
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If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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Why did the rabbit run out of the fast-food restaurant? He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on a toasted bunny.
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More jokes about: animal, food
Chuck Norris can stop the music.
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Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
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What is the definition of "derange"? De place where de cowboys ride.
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