Once visiting Arizona, Chuck Norris spat on the ground. The place is now known as the meteor crater.
Q: What happens when spectroscopists are idle? A: They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
What did the black kid get for Christmas? YOUR BIKE!
"My wife and I always compromise, I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me."
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
A housewife buys a parrot to keep her company during the day. The clerk warns that the parrot was donated by a brothel, where he may have picked up some colorful language. The housewife doesn't mind and brings the parrot home. When she uncovers the cage, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Madam. Hello Madam." When her three daughters come home from school, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Girls. Hello Girls." Finally, her husband, Phil, comes home from work, just in time for dinner. When he walks past the parrot, the parrot says, "Brawkk! Hi Phil!"
Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ? A: Turkey.
I'm not racist, some of my best slaves are black.
Yo' Mama is so old, she calls her waterbed the Dead Sea.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her mouth is like an Almond Joy bar full of nuts.