When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
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Q: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object?
A: Chuck Norris is clapping.
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Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Chuck Norris plays Scrabble with numbers.
And wins.
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Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Some people wear Superman pajamas.
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
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Chuck Norris only weakness, is weakness, of course!
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Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
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Chuck norris made medusa turn into stone.
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Chuck Norris does not sleep.
He waits.
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