Sex is like math:
Add the bed
Subtract the clothes
Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
Do you like maths?
If so add a bed subtract your clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
Yo mama is so old, that when she farts all that comes out is dust.
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they?
A: His left hand and his right hand.
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A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight!
Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet.
Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised thug said
"Why did you put up such a fight?"
To which the man promptly replied "I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in my shoe!"
At Andersen Air Force Base, Guam, a man in civilian clothes approached an airman and requested a vehicle pass.
The young airman, fresh out of technical training, asked to see his military ID, driver's license and his vehicle registration.
Noticing the letters BG on the man's identification, the new airman asked, "What's BG stand for - Big Guy?"
"No," the man replied, leaning over the counter. "Try Brigadier General."
Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.
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"Wow, look at that! Isn't it beautiful? Let's destroy it."
-People
That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
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Q: Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple?
A: Finding half a worm."
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