Best jokes ever

Q:What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A:Santa stops after three hos.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: sport
Q: Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain? A: He has got no beef.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, cowboy, money
The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: athlete, sex, women
Q: How does a blonde part her hair?  A: By doing the splits.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back? From crawling across the street when the sign said, "DON'T WALK."
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A three year old walked over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office. He inquisitively ask the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?" She replied, "I'm having a baby." With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?" She said, "He sure is." Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?" She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby." With an even more surprised and shocked look, he asked... "Then why did you eat him?"
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: kids
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'" "But why?" asks the man. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replies.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: divorce, lawyer, love, Valentines day
Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, Chuck Norris
Freds voice is high because Chuck Norris kicked him in the nuts.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music
A farmer brought his daughter a little pot-belly pet pig. She called it "Stinky" when she played with it out in the yard, but she called it "Ballpoint" when it was in the sty. "Tell me," asked her father, "Why do you have two names for your pig?" "That’s easy," she replied, "Ballpoint is just his pen name."
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, kids
<<<705706707708
More jokes →
Page 705 of 1391.