Best jokes ever

Why do black people lean to the center of their car? "They think the smell is coming from the outside."
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Q: How do 5 gay men walk? A: One Direction!
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Why is it hard for a blonde to count to 70? Because 69 is such a mouthful.
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A Liberal found a magic genie's lamp and rubbed it. The genie said, "I will grant you one wish." He said, "I wish I were smarter". So the genie made him a Republican.
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More jokes about: democrat, genie, political, republican, stupid
Air Force Approach: "Eagle 13, turn right to 330." Eagle 13: "Roger 330." App: "Eagle 13, I've been working since last night, Will you do me a favor?" Eagle 13: "Affirmative. Go ahead." App: "Down below on your right, you'll see a base house with yellow roof near the lake. That is my house. I had a fight with my Wife, and I'm worried she might take it out on my Harley. Do you see a Harley Davidson near the house?" Eagle 13: "Negative sir. Instead I can see a Ryder's truck."
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A young man and a young woman were soon to be married, but they both had a problem they had never told anyone else about. The man approached his father one day before the wedding and told him about his problem. His feet REALLY stunk, even if he washed them constantly, he was worried that this would scare off his new bride, so he needed a solution, fast. His father pondered the situation and finally told his son to wear socks constantly (even to bed) and always wash his feet whenever he got a chance. The son thought about this and went along happy. The same day the young lady approached her mother and told her about her problem. Her morning breath was horrid. Her mother reassured her and told her everyone had bad morning breath. The young woman told her mother that this was not normal morning breath but easily the worst in the world. The mother thinks about this and comes up with this bright idea. She tells her daughter to get up earlier than everyone else and don't say a thing, go make breakfast and then brush her teeth while the others are eating. The young woman thinks and then runs off to get ready for the wedding, happy. The couple is married and they are happy, him with his perpetual socks and her with her morning silences. One morning about 5:30 am the young man wakes up to find one sock missing. He starts rustling around in the bed looking for it, which of course wakes up his wife, who without thinking asks what's wrong. With a look of shock on his face the young man says, "OH MY GOD! You've swallowed my sock!"
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More jokes about: disgusting, food, marriage, wedding, wife
Phil: What makes a Cyclops such an effective teacher? Cheryl: I don’t know. Phil: He has only one pupil.
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What's a difference between a blond and a mosquito? once you smack a mosquito it stops sucking
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Where's the safest place to be when a bunch of white guys are playing basketball? Under the Hoop
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What’s the difference between a bar and a g-spot? Most men have no trouble finding a bar.
Vote: has 56.60 % from 177 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, sex