Best jokes ever

A fireman comes home from work one day and tells his wife, "We have a wonderful system at the fire station: Bell 1 rings, we put on our jackets; Bell 2 rings, we slide down the pole; Bell 3 rings, we're on the trucks. From now on, we're going to run this house the same way. When I say Bell 1, I want you to strip naked. When I say Bell 2, I want you to jump into bed. When I say Bell 3, we're going to make passionate love." The next night, the fireman comes home from work and yells, "Bell 1!" His wife takes off her clothes. "Bell 2," and his wife jumps into bed. "Bell 3," and they began to make love. After two minutes, his wife yells, "Bell 4!" "What's Bell 4?" the husband asks. "More hose," she replies, "you're nowhere near the fire!"
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has 54.10 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: love, marriage, wife, work
What do you call a black guy in a coffin? A box of chocolate.
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has 54.09 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: racist
What happens to black people after they die? Nigger Mortis.
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has 54.09 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: black people, death, racist
Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher said, it was a peace of cake.
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has 54.09 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: school
An eclipse is just the suns attempt to hide from Chuck Norris.
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has 54.09 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Six mates were seated at the bar, each trying to impress one another with the size of their dicks. The bragging went on for almost an hour, and the bartender got tired of hearing about cocks, so he said, "Let's put an end to all this crap and find out who's lying and who isn't. Each of you whip out your dong and lay it on the bar." All six of them did. Just at that moment a faggot walked into the bar, and the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink. The queer looked down the bar, and in a lisping voice, he said, "No thanks, I'll just have some of the buffet."
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has 54.08 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: gay
Q: What does a black person have in common with a soda machine? A: They both don't work and always take your money.
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has 54.07 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: black people, money, racist, work
Little Johnny asks his mum, "Mum, do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time in a faraway land'?"  "No darling," says his mother, somewhat distressed, "Sometimes, they can begin with 'I've got too much work in the office tonight, I'll come home later'."
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has 54.06 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, work
What did the flower say to be the bee? "Buzz off you stupid ugly horny cunt."
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has 54.06 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, dirty, vulgar
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common? A: Both take it in the rear.
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has 54.06 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: car, dirty, gay
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