Best jokes ever

Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!

Roses are red tulips are black. You'd look great with a knife in your back.

The black guy I was walking behind stopped, turned and asked "Are you following me?" "No", I said "You've got evolution all mixed up."

Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.

Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.

A newlywed couple on their honeymoon prepares to see each other naked for the first time. The husband exposes his knotted and twisted feet. He explains, "I had tolio as a child." The wife asks if he means polio. He says, "No, it only affects the toes." He removes his pants and reveals deformed knees. He admits, "I had kneesles, too." Finally, he pulls off his boxers. In shock, the woman gasps, "Oh no...smallcox, too!"

I hate Chuck Norris. Oh SHI...

What is the difference between a black monopoly board and a white one. The black on you roll any number and you go to jail.

The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.

He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.