Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
Six mates were seated at the bar, each trying to impress one another with the size of their dicks.
The bragging went on for almost an hour, and the bartender got tired of hearing about cocks, so he said, "Let's put an end to all this crap and find out who's lying and who isn't. Each of you whip out your dong and lay it on the bar."
All six of them did.
Just at that moment a faggot walked into the bar, and the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink.
The queer looked down the bar, and in a lisping voice, he said, "No thanks, I'll just have some of the buffet."
Q: What is the difference between Harry Potter and a jew?
A: Harry Potter escaped the chamber.
What's worse than 11 dead babies stapled to a tree?
1 dead baby stapled to 11 trees.
Vote:
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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Anal sex is like your first car - you dont really want it, but your dad gave it to you anyways.
Vote:
Q: Why do we paint Easter eggs?
A: Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!
Q: What is a ghosts favorite snack?
A: Boo berries
Vote:
A rabbi and a priest crash into each other at a four-way junction.
They both get out of their cars and look at the wreck.
They both thank God they are OK, and the priest says, ‘This must be a sign that God wanted us to meet.’
The rabbi says, ‘Yes, indeed, let’s drink.’
So the rabbi gets out some wine.
They toast each other and the priest drinks his glass.
But the rabbi doesn’t take a taste of his drink.
Priest: ‘Why aren’t you drinking?’
Rabbi: ‘I’m waiting for the police.’
"Isn't the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl.
"Say, do you know who I am?" asked the girl.
"No."
"I'm the principal's daughter."
"And do you know who I am?" asked the boy.
"No," she replied.
"Thank goodness!"