I was walking down the street to a video store last night to rent a porno movie when I saw a woman being raped. Saved myself a fiver.
There is nothing wrong with sex on TV – as long as you don’t fall off.
The bartender asks: "Would all three of you like some beer?" The first one replies, "I don't know." The second one replies, "I don't know either." The third replies, "Yes."
You're so ugly, Yo' Mama had to be drunk to breastfeed you.
Yo' Mama has more crabs than Red Lobster.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, Red Lobster kicked her out for bringing her own crabs.
Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
Doctor doctor I feel that Im a pack of card. What can I do ? Doctor: I deal with you later.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
There are 5 known levels of Super-Saiyan. Achieving the 6th level is known as "Going Chuck Norris."