Q: Why do hurricanes travel so fast?
A: Because if they travelled slowly, we'd have to call them slow-i-canes.
Your mother is so fat, that when she jumped for joy, she got stuck!
Yo mama so fat her boobs squirts out milk.
Your nails are so long when you come around the corner the police arrested you for dangerous weapons.
Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
Vote:
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
Vote:
What kind of a car does a proctologist drive?
A brown Probe!
Vote:
Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
Vote:
Why do men name their penises?
Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the one who makes all their decisions.
A girl visited her boyfriend, which was still living with his mother, at his house.
His mother had Puritan principals.
The mother, as long as the girl was there, didn’t even try to hide her dislike feelings for his son’s choice.
"Mom, can I escort Helen?"
The girl, waiting to hear a cold hearted "no", she surprised hears: "Sure... You can! Escort her... to the corner with your eyes!"