Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
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What kind of a car does a proctologist drive?
A brown Probe!
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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
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A girl visited her boyfriend, which was still living with his mother, at his house.
His mother had Puritan principals.
The mother, as long as the girl was there, didn’t even try to hide her dislike feelings for his son’s choice.
"Mom, can I escort Helen?"
The girl, waiting to hear a cold hearted "no", she surprised hears: "Sure... You can! Escort her... to the corner with your eyes!"
If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win.
Period.
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When Chuck Norris visits Europe on vacation, France surrenders.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
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Chuck Norris terrorizes terrorism.
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The climate requires Chuck's permission to change.
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Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune.
The last twenty nine minutes were spent in an awkward silence, waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.
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