Best jokes ever

While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not. I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?" The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: blonde, stupid
Q: What is a ghosts favorite snack? A: Boo berries
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: food, Thanksgiving
"And so, God came forth and proclaimed widescreen is the best" Sony 16:9
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: bible, god, technology
Q: Why do men snore when they lie on their backs? A: Because when their balls fall over their a**holes, they vapor-lock.
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
John and Bob were inseparable childhood friends. One night, they both died in a terrible car accident. When John woke up in heaven, he began to search for Bob but could not find him anywhere. Very distraught, he ran to St. Peter and said, "St. Peter, I know Bob was killed in that accident with me, but I can’t find him!" St. Peter said, "My son, I am sorry to tell you Bob didn’t make it to Heaven." This upset John so much that St. Peter agreed to let him see Bob one more time. St. Peter parted the clouds and John saw Bob sitting in hell with a keg on one side and a beautiful buxom blonde on the other. John looked at St. Peter skeptically and said, "Are you sure I’m in the right place?" "My son," St. Peter said, "looks can be deceiving. You see that keg of beer? It has a hole in it. You see that woman? She doesn’t!"
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, heaven, men
Q: Two black guys decide to jump off a building; who lands first? A: Who cares?
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has 53.18 % from 193 votes. More jokes about: black people
What do you do if you see your TV floating? Say " DROP IT NIGGA". What do you do if you see you refridgerator floating? Run because that is one hell of a big black guy!
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has 53.16 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, technology
A woman woke in the middle of the night to find her husband missing from their bed. In the stillness of the house, she could hear a muffled sound downstairs. She went downstairs and looked around, still not finding her husband. Listening again, she could definitely hear moaning. She went down to the basement to find her husband, crouched in the corner facing the wall, sobbing. "What's wrong with you?" she asked him. "Remember when your father caught us together when you were 16?" he replied. "And remember, he said, I had two choices - I could either marry you, or spend the next 20 years in prison." Baffled, she said, "Yes, I remember. So?" "I would have gotten out today."
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has 53.16 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: marriage
I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf
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has 53.16 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, IT, technology
KFC in Asia? Korean fried cat.
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has 53.15 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: black humor, cat, food, mean
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