Best jokes ever

Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: food, sport
There are an older brother and a younger sister. The sister went to the bathroom while the brother was in the bathroom. The sister asks the brother if she could play with his dick and he says yeah. A few weeks later there was a big storm and the sister goes to the brother's room and asked the brother if she could play with Mr.Cuddles he says no. Then the sister said that she would tell on him so a little pissed of he says yes. After a while, the parents hear a scream. They rush to the brother's room and asks the sister what happened she said "Mr.Cuddles spat on me so I bit his head off."
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, family, sex, time
Chuck Norris could catch that damn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Roses are blue My thumb's got a sliver I drank far too much and I'm killing my liver.
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, death, drunk, poems
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
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has 53.01 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, phone, travel
Chuck Norris round house kicked the xbox and made the xbox 360.
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has 53.00 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, technology
A black family of four, hears about a magical river that can turn them white if they swim across so they go and the dad and mom swim across, and they come out white, the daughter jumps in and swims across and she turn white, so the son trys to swim but the current takes him and the little girl goes up to dad and says, "Daddy, daddy, Philip just got taken by the current" and the dad says, "Oh, forget that nigga."
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has 52.99 % from 142 votes. More jokes about: black people, family, sport, travel
Andrew went to Medical Insurance to apply for his pension. The woman behind the bench asked for his driving license to verify his age, but he had left his wallet home. He said to her that he had to go home and return later. The woman said: "Unbuckle your shirt." And so he did, revealing his curly, gray hair of his chest. "These gray hair is quite a nice proof for me," she said and continued with his application form. When Andrew went home, he said to his wife what had happened. "You should have taken your pants off," she said, "Maybe you would have taken disability pension too!"
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has 52.97 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: age, marriage, money, wife, women
A man and his wife shower together. The husband puts his hand on her breast and says, "These are nice, but if they were a bit firmer you could walk around without a bra for me." Then the husband pats her butt and says, "This is nice, but if it was a bit firmer, you could walk around without panties for me." The wife turns around to her husband, grabs his groin and says, "This is nice, but if it was a little bigger, I wouldn't need your brother."
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has 52.96 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Q: What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A: A dino-snore!
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has 52.96 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: communication, dinosaur
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