What's a rabbits favorite movie?
Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds.
One of the boys said, "What is that?"
"They're smart pills," said the other boy.
"Eat them and they'll make you smarter."
So he ate them and said, "These taste like crap."
"See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already."
Vote:
Yo mamma so fat and scary, Godzilla watches "yo mamma" movies!
Yo mama is so ugly the mirror did not make an reflection.
Why is it dangerous to tell the husband to go and change the son?
Two hours later he comes back with a baby girl.
What should a rabbit use to keep his fur neat?
A harebrush.
Q: What's the difference between pea soup and roast beef?
A: Anyone can roast beef.
Vote:
A diner complained, "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
His waiter replied, "That's entirely possible; our cook used to be a tailor."
A white man walks into a bar and says to a bartender "Hey nigger. Gimme a beer".
The bartender says "Don't say that to me. What happened if I said something like that to you?".
"The white man says "I don't know lets find out".
They switch places.
The black comes in and said "Hey honkey, gimme a f*ckin' beer".
The white man says "Sorry. We don't serve niggers"
One man's marriage has gotten a bit dull, so he asks a friend if he has any ideas on how to add some excitement back to the marriage.
"Well," his friend says, "you can always have an affair."
"I can't do that! I will always be faithful to her." the troubled man replies.
"If you convince her to let you do it, and then it won't be cheating."
The man agrees to give it a try. The next time his wife seems to be in a very good mood he shares the idea with her that a new partner would add excitement.
"Honey," his wife says, "that won't help our marriage.
Believe me, I already tried it."