Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter?
It sure gave them something to chew over.
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Q: Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?
A: He wanted to transcend dental medication!
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
Two friends talking:
"What's up?"
"My wife left me for my best friend.."
"I thought I was your best friend..."
"Now he is."
Your mama's teeth are so messed up....i thought her tongue was in jail!
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first?
Friend: I don't know, who?
Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions.
A beautiful princess comes upon a frog in a meadow near her castle.
The frog hops into the princess' lap and says, "My lady, one kiss from you, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I once was, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set-up housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever be happy doing so."
That night, as the princess dines on lightly sauteed frog legs, she chuckles to herself, "I don't f**kin' think so."
You momma's teeth are so nasty the b*tch spits yoohoo.
What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body?
My dick.
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