Yo mama is so stinky that she scared the fly's off the shit wagonrn.
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Two friends talking:
"What's up?"
"My wife left me for my best friend.."
"I thought I was your best friend..."
"Now he is."
Your mama's teeth are so messed up....i thought her tongue was in jail!
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first?
Friend: I don't know, who?
Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions.
A beautiful princess comes upon a frog in a meadow near her castle.
The frog hops into the princess' lap and says, "My lady, one kiss from you, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I once was, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set-up housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever be happy doing so."
That night, as the princess dines on lightly sauteed frog legs, she chuckles to herself, "I don't f**kin' think so."
You momma's teeth are so nasty the b*tch spits yoohoo.
What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body?
My dick.
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Q: How many Anglicans or Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They always use candles.
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I never thought that the Internet was very useful, but now I've changed my mind.
Let's hope your new one works better than the one you had before.
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