Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
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When Chuck Norris eats teddy grahams, he craps out grizzly bears.
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It's 4:04.
Do you know where your auditor is?
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If you want a list of Chuck Norri's enemies, just check the extinct species list.
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When should you feel sorry for a skunk?
When its spray pump is out of order!.
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
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The Terminator said, "I'll be back" because he saw Chuck Norris was coming.
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What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
When you take sausage out of the fridge it doesn't fart.
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An asp in the grass is a snake, but a grasp in the ass is a goose.
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Yo mama's so fat, she walked across the dance-floor...and the band skipped!