Wet doesn't get Chuck Norris Chuck Norris gets wet.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed.
She is now known as Britney Spears.
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Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter?
It sure gave them something to chew over.
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Q: Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?
A: He wanted to transcend dental medication!
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea.
Until it met Chuck Norris.
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What's green and yellow and eats nuts?
Gonorrhea.
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A blonde, a brunet and a red head were running from the cops when they came upon three empty sacks laying in front of a closed store.
"Let's hide in these and the cops won't find us!" said the red head, and they each dove into the sacks.
The brunet hid in one that said CAT.
The red head hid in one that said DOG, and the blonde hid in one that said POTATOS.
When the cops came by, they saw the bags and said: "Maybe they're in these sacks. Kick one of them." to the other.
The other cop kicked the bag the brunet was in that said CAT and she said: "Meow!".
So the cop kicked the second bag with the red head that said DOG. She said once kicked: "Woof!".
So the cop moved on to the final sack that said POTATOS and kicked it.
The blonde cried out: "Potatos!"
A man goes to the doctor. "Doctor, that medicine you gave me isn't working. Is there anything else I could try?".
"Fill out this tax form," suggests the doctor.
"How's that going to help me?", asks the man.
"I'm not sure," replies the doctor, "but some of my patients say it gives them relief."
Yo mama is so stinky that she scared the fly's off the shit wagonrn.
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