What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A milk dud.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.
The only mark ever made on Chuck Norris is his birth mark.
Vote:
Chuck Norris: The Game starts directly with the ending video.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
Vote:
Two friends talking:
"What's up?"
"My wife left me for my best friend.."
"I thought I was your best friend..."
"Now he is."
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first?
Friend: I don't know, who?
Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions.
Your mama's teeth are so messed up....i thought her tongue was in jail!
A beautiful princess comes upon a frog in a meadow near her castle.
The frog hops into the princess' lap and says, "My lady, one kiss from you, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I once was, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set-up housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever be happy doing so."
That night, as the princess dines on lightly sauteed frog legs, she chuckles to herself, "I don't f**kin' think so."