Chuck Norris was once hospitalised, becaused he kicked his own ass.
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Chuck Norris kills time in his spare time.
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Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
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Wet doesn't get Chuck Norris Chuck Norris gets wet.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed.
She is now known as Britney Spears.
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Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter?
It sure gave them something to chew over.
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Q: Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?
A: He wanted to transcend dental medication!
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
Charlie Sheen winning?
Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A milk dud.