Best jokes ever

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol
Yo mama's so fat that when she goes walking on the beach in heals she strikes oil.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, technology, Yo mama
Why would I buy a pumpkin at the store for $5 when I can drive 30 miles & pay to make my kids walk through a field to pick our own for $27.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: driving, kids, money
"I'm going to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. But it is just a formality." "Who told you that?" "Gynecologist."
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
A blonde and her husband were driving home, when they hit a rabit. They both got out of the car and stood over the poor creature. The blonde and her husband just stood their, when she said "Oh I know." So she when in the car and rumaged through her purse and came out with what looked a bottle. She poured it on the rabit and they both got in the car. Suddenly the rabit got up hopped a little bit and waved, hopped a little and waved, hopped to the top of the hill and waved. Then dissapered over it. The husband just stared at his wife and said "Honey, what did you pour on that rabit?" His wife just said "Hair Restorer with a permanent wave."
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, blonde, car, driving, life
Chuck Norris gave Iceman frostbite.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance she leaned over and pushed me.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall? A: Captain's log.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn't bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand" "So," says the second drunk, "what's your point?" "Well," says the first, "I'm just wondering how much stronger I'm gonna get!"
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, alcohol, bar, bartender, drunk