My dad died on 9-11.
He was the best amateur bomber on Iraq's flight team.
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The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.
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What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elkaseltzer.
Why was the cannibal fined by the judge?
He was caught poaching.
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Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup."
Waiter: "That’s all right sir, he won’t drink much."
Not even Houdini can escape from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia.
That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
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