Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
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Q:What's the hardest thing about learning to play tennis?
A:Telling your parents that your gay!
Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: I want to hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand.
People believe in God. God believe in Chuck Norris.
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The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.
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What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elkaseltzer.
Chuck Norris solved Unsolved Mysteries.
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Why was the cannibal fined by the judge?
He was caught poaching.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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