Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thought Meow Mix was a rap CD for cats.
Yo mama so fat that she is called America.
After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.
The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
A Klondike bar would do anything for a Chuck Norris.
Q: What u call 10 black people in the back of a truck? A: A good days hunting.
A blond a, a brunette and a redhead were at the top of a cliff looking down at the beach. Suddenly a genie appears to them and says "I will grant you each one wish if you'll jump off the side of this cliff." So the redhead jumps off and shouts "Seagull" and turns into a seagull and flies away. Then the brunette jumps off and shouts "Whale" and turns into a whale, falls into the sea and swims away. Finally the blond runs towards the cliff edge, but trips at the last second, as as she falls she shouts out "Shit"
How did they know that the driver had dandruff? They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.
What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ? A Pedophiles ass.
Whenever Chuck Norris rolls a 6 sided dice, he always rolls a 7.