Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
Q: How do you wake up Lady gaga?
A: Poke her face.
Where do you go if you become ‘at one’ with your computer?
Nerdvana.
A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars?
A: Elfis!
Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God.
What’s the difference between cats and dogs?
Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
Randy Johnson can throw a fastball 101mph.
Chuck Norris can throw Randy Johnson 101mph.
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life.
Unless I buy something.’ Jackie Mason
Chuck Norris once gave a box of his old watches to a group of kids.
These kids are now known as the power rangers.