Yo momma’s so ugly, when she was lying on the beach, the cat tried to bury her.
Your momma so fat... Her blood type is Ragu.
Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake up a sleeping bag.
Your momma so stupid, when I told her it was chilly outside she ran out with a spoon!
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
A teacher was giving a lesson and was telling the pupils that we came from Adam and Eve. A hand went up and the kid said, "But my dad told me that we come from apes, Miss?" Miss replied, "Stay out of this one, Leroy!"
Q: What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street? A: Put them in a barking lot.
What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags.
Q: What do you call a holy redneck with absolutely no family? A: The Sole inbred.
What do you call 35,000 men with their hands up? "Iraqi Army."