When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris logged in to WoW, everyone logged out.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Most kids pee their name into snow...
Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can make a slinky go upstairs.
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Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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Chuck Norris has an Xbox Live account. On Playstation
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Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
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Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
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