The best age jokes

A 5 year old and a 3 year old are upstairs in their bedroom "You know what?" says the 5 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The 3 year old nods his head in approval, so the 5 year old says, "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me, ok?" "Ok" the 3 year old, agrees with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 5 year old what he wants for breakfast. "Shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Fruit Loops." (WHACK...she spanks him) He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. She looked at the 3 year old and asked with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know mum, but it won't be fucking Fruit Loops."
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: age, food, kids
How do you get four old ladies to shout "F*ck"? Get a fifth old lady to shout "Bingo!"
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: age, game, old people
An old seamstress is slowly walking back to her job from lunch, when a flasher jumps out of an alley and opens his coat wide. The old woman looks him up and down, shakes her head sadly, and says "You call that a lining?"
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: age, old people, work
When we moved to the US I was 8 years old. I remember asking my father if I can have an allowance? When he asked me what that was, I said you're allowed to give me money.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: age, family, geography, life, money
Yo mama is so old that God doesn't remember her.
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has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: age, god, memory, Yo mama
Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn't bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand" "So," says the second drunk, "what's your point?" "Well," says the first, "I'm just wondering how much stronger I'm gonna get!"
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has 59.80 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, alcohol, bar, bartender, drunk
Yo mama is so old she was electrocuted with steam.
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has 59.80 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, Yo mama
Yo momma is so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas.
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has 59.20 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: age, Christmas, time, Yo mama
Yo mama so old her social security number is 3!
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: age, insulting, Yo mama
How can you tell which rabbits are the oldest in a group? Look for gray hares.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: age, animal
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