The best animal jokes

It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ''No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,'' he said to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump. As he was cleaning up, the lady came in. ''Here,'' she said, handling him his pack of cigarettes. ''I found them in the hallway.'' ''Now,'' she said, ''if only I could find my parakeet.''
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has 43.90 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, work
What famous painting do cows love to look at? The Moona Lisa.
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has 43.90 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, love
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot
Q: Who was the most famous pirate octopus? A: Captain Squid.
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, pirate
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography, Thanksgiving
Why did the spider buy a car? So he could take it out for a spin!
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has 43.65 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
Q: How many sheep do you need to make a sweater? A: I don’t know. I didn’t think sheep could knit!
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
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has 43.46 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, chocolate, disgusting, easter, food
Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.
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has 43.46 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
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