The best animal jokes

What is a Zebra? A Z-bra is 25 sizes bigger than an A-bra.
Vote: has 39.32 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why did the lion brake up with his girlfriend? A: Cuz she was a CHEETAH!
Vote: has 39.32 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman… “Mr Cook?” “Yes,” I replied. “I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.” I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
Vote: has 39.32 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
Vote: has 39.21 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

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If toast always lands butter-side down and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast to the back of a cat and drop it?
Vote: has 38.99 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

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Why does the chicken is sad? Because his dad is a cock. Why does the chicken is even more sad? Because he faces the same future.
Vote: has 38.49 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

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Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner? He was already stuffed!
Vote: has 37.92 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

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Late one night a couple is driving down a country highway and run over an oppossum. Knowing that mother oppossums often carry babies in their pouch, they decide to check out this poor animal. Sure enough there was a baby, so they decide to rescue it. They take it into the car and continue down the road. The little oppossum is scared and squirming around like crazy so the wife asks her husband what she should do? He thinks for a minute and says, " Well it's used to being in it's mother's pouch. Maybe if you unbutton your jeans, and put it in "there" it will calm down." She exclaims, " I'm not going to do that! That thing is smelly and nasty!" The husband replies," Well, why don't you just hold it's little nose!"
Vote: has 37.61 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
Vote: has 37.61 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog? A: Gee, we really do taste like chicken!
Vote: has 37.38 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

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