The best animal jokes

A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer. The bartender approaches and says, "We don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings." The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer. The bartender tells him again, more forcefully, "We don't serve beer to belligerent bears in bars in Billings." The bear, very angry now, says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that lady sitting at the end of the bar." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings." The bear goes to the end of the bar, and, as promised, eats the woman. He comes back to his seat and again demands a beer. The bartender states, "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings who are on drugs." The bear says, "I'm NOT on drugs." Te bartender says, "You are now. That was a barbitchyouate."
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Q: What side of the cow gives the most milk? A: The utter side.
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What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
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Q:Why did the cow cross the road? A:To go to the moo-vies.
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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? He keeps coming and coming and coming...
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Q. Why did the tiger loose at poker? A. Because he was playing with a cheetah.
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Why did the dinosaur have so few friends? Because Tyrannosaurus reeks!
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What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
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So...I had this rabbit that died of heatstroke after a week and I didn't have a time to name it. So after it died and was on my lap the name came to me...I'll call it floppy!
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How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
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