What does a frog say when it sees something' great?
Toadly awesome!
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What four animals does a woman like to have in her house?
A tiger in bed, a mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage and a jackass to pay for it all.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider?
A harenet.
Dogs may shed, but cats shred.
Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence.
Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked: "What are you up to there, Nancy?"
"My goldfish died", replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."
The neighbor was concerned:
"That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"
Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied:
"That's because he's inside your fucking cat."
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death, time
More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death, time
Someone figured out my password.
Now I have to rename my dog.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar, one turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew twenty bucks in there..."
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Because its mother panda d to its every whim.